Since we became parents, Jennifer and I have been told
countless times by others to treasure the moments having a child brings. We
often hear, “your children grow up too quickly so make each moment count.” We
have even been told to write down things Hannah says so we can recall them and
maybe even use them to embarrass her later on in her life.
We heed these things. We understand there is value in
listening to those with prior experience. So, we have collected some of the
things Hannah has said and done over time. We understand there will come a time
when we will miss and will want to recall the cute way she says “sparkly” (she
says it “spark-a-lee”) or how she has called the TV remote control a “commote”.
I know one day we will be glad to go back and read how Hannah left food in the
yard for Santa’s reindeer on Christmas Eve when she was two years old or the
day I put her shoes on the wrong feet and didn’t notice this until I dropped
Hannah off at daycare and someone else had to point it out to me despite Hannah
herself telling me her shoes hurt her feet.
Anyway, we do try to enjoy the moments raising a little girl
brings. I understand from having nieces and nephews and friends with children
how they turn from cuddly bundles of fun into pirates and princesses and
superheroes and then into teenagers and then into young adults. That process
takes time-time that seems slow until that one day when you come to this
sobering realization how time really has passed by and how these moments you
store away hold more value than you could claim and despite you knowing this
day was coming still it has arrived seemingly out of the blue.
The here and now though is here and now. The reality of the
day-to-day world with a three year old is immediate and demanding compared to
the golden years of tomorrow when the bad memories are eclipsed by the good
ones. So, now while we enjoy the fun and sentimental moments, we also as easily
recognize that raising a child is not one Hallmark card moment after another.
It is hard work. It is tiring. As often as it is can be very rewarding, it
sometimes is very difficult. For every cute memorable thing she says there can
be a handful of whiny, screaming fits complete with streaming tears and feet
pounding on the floor---and that’s just me and her mom.
So while we are storing away the warm, fuzzy moments for a
later time we understand now in some way how they intersect with those moments
of frustration and despair. It’s in those moments other memorable things happen
and when they do they usually reveal themselves in some spoken manner. We are
storing those things away also.
No, these things are not a list of words or phrases we may
say that we fear Hannah will hear and repeat, although we have that list also.
It’s not a list of things our parents said to us that we vowed to never say to
our children but find ourselves saying either. Instead, it is words Jennifer or
I have strung together in an exasperating moment with Hannah that makes us
wonder if these exact words have ever been strung together in the exact order by
another human being in the history of the world.
This first happened on a trip to visit family in Georgia.
The trip takes about an hour and a half to drive. We left on a late Friday
afternoon but stopped about thirty minutes into the trip to eat a bite of
supper at a Mexican restaurant. Hannah was probably just over a year old at the
time and was beginning to be more mobile and animated. We provided her with
rice and a few bites of chicken to eat while we tried to eat our own entrees.
At some point eating became boring to Hannah. This is when she picked up a
piece of chicken and tossed back her arm. This is when I realized what was
about to happen and words that I never imagined I would put together in this
order came spilling out of my mouth, “Don't throw the chicken!" I must
tell you about the time the ch- of the word “chicken” bumped past my front
teeth on their way out into the half-full dining room, I realized what a
ridiculous sounding thing I was saying. As the tiny piece of chicken flew past
my eyes I realized Jennifer and I would likely spend some time during Hannah’s
life stringing together other words into phrases that we would never expect to
hear or say. Needless to say, that night after the chicken throwing incident,
we determined to write down these phrases as well.
Now, we share these with you. Things we have
said to Hannah that we never imagined we would ever say that somehow formulate
logically in the brain but escape the mouth sounding more than a tad bit silly.
"Don't
chew on the camel's foot."
This was said one day as Hannah was
carrying around a small toy camel and chewing on the camel’s foot. When I said
it though I imagined the “hump day” camel from the TV commercial and started
laughing almost immediately which just zapped my credibility with Hannah at
that moment. I think I have hidden the toy camel so this phrase will never
again have to be spoken.
"Trying to figure
out what a two year old is saying is like playing a never-ending game of Mad
Gab."
This was said, likely on more than one
occasion, as Hannah became more verbal and was learning to speak. If you have
ever played Mad Gab and also spent much time around a two year old you get this
as the game is nothing but guessing and guessing what the little one is trying
to say. The difference is the game provides you with the real answer. With the
two year old, you can never be quite sure you have successfully guessed what
she is trying to say.
"I am trying to get
the cheese out of your hair."
Looking presentable to others is important,
so grooming is a necessity. Often this task is a struggle anyway. Throw in some
delicious cheese and the process becomes even more complicated. Still, we never
thought we would have to say those eleven words when trying to comb Hannah’s
hair one day.
"Sit down and I will
give you your pancake and your monkey.”
I must say this is my personal favorite. It
makes me want to just snicker and snort every time I think of it. Sometimes,
when I am alone I just say it out loud to amuse myself. Jennifer said this to
Hannah once at the dining room table when Hannah did not want to sit to eat but
did want to hold her stuffed toy monkey. The promise of holding the stuffed
monkey while eating a pancake dangled over Hannah’s head until she finally sat
at the table with the rest of us. By the time she did this we were all in tears
from laughing so hard.
"If you put that
under your armpit, you are still going to have to eat it."
Dinner time in the summer sometimes poses fashion issues such as sleeveless
tops. Throw an adventurous child into the mix and one would never think said
child would need to be warned that placing food into her armpit area would not get her
out of eating said food.
"Take your foot out
of the cheese bowl."
So many of these seem to revolve around food, don’t they?
Getting Hannah to sit at the table for more than a few minutes is quite a
challenge. Rather quickly, she wants to sit in someone’s lap or lean on
someone’s shoulder. Sometimes, she wants to sit in odd positions at the table
that sometimes allow her feet to end up in places they shouldn’t. And to
think, I was really looking forward to more queso that night.
"Princesses do wear
underwear."
Potty training is fun, isn’t it? Since our
three year old believes she is a princess we never thought we would be having a
debate with her about how real princesses do indeed wear underwear after going
potty.
“I do
not want oatmeal on the bed.”
More food! Hannah walked into our bedroom
one morning with a bowl of oatmeal just as Jennifer finished making the bed. It
made sense at the time.
“Get
that booger off your foot!”
Uh, let’s not talk about this one.
“Well,
hurry up and get your superpowers on!”
This is the most recent addition to this
list. As Hannah and I were leaving for daycare one morning, Hannah stood up in
the backseat and grabbed hold of one of the supports above the car window. She
then began making whirling noises. I told her she needed to sit in her car seat
so she could be buckled in for the ride ahead. She then told me I would have to
wait while she put on her superpowers. She then proceeded to make more whirling
noises as the above phrase came spilling out of my mouth.
Yes, we are trying to remember so many of
the special moments raising our daughter will bring us as we know Hannah will
grow up quicker than we want. Still, in the day to day moments when life is
hard and difficult for all involved, it is nice to find something funny to make
things lighter and a bit easier to get through. After all, laughter >
crying.
(We would love to hear other things said
that made temporary sense but now just sit out in space sounding ridiculous. Feel
free to share them with us if you would like to do so.)
Still,
deep inside, I am an optimist. I believe at least some of the holidays should
be filled with some happiness if possible and even if it’s is a fleeting thing.
True, it may be hard to find a silver lining in some situations. And truer
still, some people just love to bathe and wallow in misery. Still, I like to
think if folks try, really try, then something can be found to make getting
through the holidays a bit more enjoyable than not trying at all.
