As The Picture Turns

Really, it’s just an ordinary picture of me and Jennifer. Frankly, it’s not my favorite picture of the two of us either. It was taken at a Christmas party hosted by her employer. On that December evening, we dressed up a bit, left Hannah with family then drove downtown. Once at our destination we gathered in small groups for informal conversation as many of those Jennifer works beside day-to-day arrived to the large decorated ballroom. Some made their way to the food tables, starting first with appetizers. The event also included a larger buffet style dinner. As the dining became more serious, folks would locate a table, gathering together to share a meal over more conversation. For those who imbibe tickets to the bar were provided. Dessert was also available, as if there isn’t enough sweet food during this particular season. Later in the evening, door prizes would be handed out in the spirit of the holiday. Even later, a large part of the ballroom would become a dance floor as a deejay accepted requests then cranked out the tunes while some folks got their groove on.

Before the dance tunes bounced off the walls making further conversation difficult, there was a small part of the ballroom reserved for photographs so that the moment could be memorialized in some way. It was mostly a no-frills situation. A small decorated Christmas tree stood a short ways from a wall. With the dim overhead lighting, any photograph taken would have a soft look and feel about it. As the evening progressed, Jennifer and I waited until the line for pictures dwindled some before we made our way to that spot. We stood in front of the tree then took a step or two to our left to add a bit of perspective to the background. We then smiled waiting for the photographer to work his magic. We returned to our table as we watched the party unfold.

Sometime later the picture made it’s way to our home. It was placed in a gold frame. For a time I recall it sat in our bedroom alongside other pictures of our life together. Without me noticing, it disappeared.

Then one night after giving Hannah a goodnight kiss and hug, I saw it in her room on a table near her bed. I remember smiling at the thought that our little girl had a picture of us in her room. Then, again, without noticing, something about that picture changed.

One night after the goodnight kiss and hug, I turned to leave only to see that the picture of me and Jennifer taken one December at a Christmas party was turned around so that it faced Hannah’s bed. This meant if you walked into the room, looked at the table where the picture was located that you would see the side and back of the picture frame. It also meant that Hannah could lay in bed and look at that picture to see her mom and dad in a captured moment from days gone by.

When I noticed the odd placement of the picture, I turned to Hannah to ask if she wanted me to straighten it up so that it looked more in order with how things should look. She said she wanted the picture to stay the way it was because the way it was turned at that moment meant that when she missed her mom and dad she could look at that picture and not miss us.

And with the words of a five-year-old ringing in my ears and taking root in my heart, I realized I might just like that picture better than what I once thought I did.

When school started this year, Hannah had a few weeks without any real homework assignments. Then, one day we were told by her teacher that at the end of the week, an assignment was due. Hannah would bring home a paper bag. She would then need to fill it with five things that described her so that her teacher and classmates could learn a bit more about her.

The night before the assignment was due we worked with Hannah to gather things for her homework. As we placed a few items into the bag, she left the living room for a moment. When she returned she was carrying the picture that sits beside her bed. Jennifer and I removed the picture from the frame then helped Hannah put it in the bag.

The next day, Hannah would pull five items from a bag to show her class then in her suddenly shy voice say something about each item including the picture that somehow gives her comfort before she falls asleep each night.

Later, sometime down in the evening, I pulled the paper bag from her backpack. I rustled through it's contents so I could find that Christmas picture. I straightened it out as best as I could. I then located it's frame and placed the photo in it's home. I looked it over one more time. I still think we have had better pictures as a couple. I still find nothing ordinary about it when I look at it. Now though I know when our daughter looks at that picture she sees past the soft overhead lighting and the weird angle of the Christmas tree. I understand she now sees a part of who she is in that picture.

I took the picture to her room. I sat it down on the table beside her bed. Before I left, I turned it toward her bed, just in case she needs it when she can't sleep.