Oh! Christmas Tree

‘Tis the season again, proving how time flies. It sure seems it was yesterday when I was pondering what to write about the holiday season. Of course, that was a year ago. But, alas, here we are again. In a year that has been upside-down and sideways, one size too large and one size too small at the same time, it is good to know how some things have not changed.

Last year in this season at our house we were in the middle of a renovation. Our dining room and deck were gone then. A skeleton of what they would become was taking form. Still, we forged ahead with our family traditions. We did what we normally did knowing the work ahead on our house would be finished soon.

Almost as soon as the renovation was completed, everything across our country closed. The virus visited our shores. Our leaders told us to wash our hands and put on masks to flatten a curve. Our instincts told us to buy toilet paper.

For me, I went from working from my office in a second-floor brick building a half-hour commute away to working from our dining room table, mere steps from the kitchen. It all happened so suddenly. My work was more challenging in some ways. Life, overall, was a bit more stressful than normal. To add to the workload, Hannah’s school finished the year remotely as well. Her summer camp was then canceled. Fortunately, Jennifer’s work scheduled continued mostly as it had before. We ended up with this different schedule for months. It was busy here every day. It seemed as if every moment was filled.

To add to all this, we could not get away for a break since travel was limited. This has meant we have seen little of my family in the past year. We have seen less of friends also. It is aggravating and disheartening to think about all the time lost in that regard. It is true we can now connect in many amazing and different ways; those ways though will never be the same as a hug from your mom or soaking in advice from your dad.

Hannah’s school opened again in August. I returned to my physical office in September. Jennifer continued her work routine as she had all along. In the new madness we learned to live through, it was good to know her schedule stayed steady as it seemed to provide an anchor so we didn’t drift too far from who we are as a family.

While the uncertainty of this virus caused changes to ripple into every day of our lives, a constant for us was gathering around our dining room table each night. It was good to have this. More than before, this time became more needed, more special. It became a time that allowed us to leave behind worries about viruses, vaccines, work-work, schoolwork, and the other concerns that creep into everyday living. Because of the different nature of this year though I think it caused a different focus at times. The changes came about so fast and so hard it was difficult to appreciate the remodeled surroundings.

This remodel project hit at the heart of who we are as a family. When we initially looked at this house, I am convinced Jennifer’s eyes lit up when we walked into that old dining area. The room featured three walls of huge windows. Our first visit was on a warm October day. The trees in the woods behind the house were changing colors. One of those windows was open allowing a breeze to pass through. It was all like a snapshot in a memory book. I am not saying that was the reason we bought this house, but I am satisfied it helped convince Jennifer that this is where we would settle. So, changing that room was a major thing.

Of course, when you live in a particular house for many years, you learn how some things just do not work out the way you thought they would initially. When we used the dining room on cold days, it was very cold. On summer afternoons, the old air-conditioning unit could not produce enough cool air to make a dent in the heat from the sunshine through the sixteen giant windows and two mostly glass doors. Then the roof leaked. I patched it. I had roofing experts patch it.  Still, heavy rain would fall and invariably leak onto the furniture.  We became fearful the roof would eventually just collapse.

And so, just after Thanksgiving 2019, this remodel started for us. We knew then we would not have the use of part of our house for a few months. That was okay though. We sacrificed that time understanding we would have a more useful house for the years ahead.

With all the craziness this year has brought, it has been hard to appreciate and enjoy these renovations. All the chaos just allowed us to do what we had to do and did not necessarily let us sit back, kick up our heels, and appreciate the changes.

Still, we have tried to maintain as many of the routine things as possible, so we don’t lose track of everything we once knew. One of those things is how we decorate for Christmas. We usually do this the Friday or Saturday after Thanksgiving. We were able to do this as a family again this year. I stretch out the multi-colored lightbulbs along our porch railing. I hang the strands of twinkling snowflakes from our porch overhang. I locate then connect power strips and extension cords to a timer that somehow magically illuminates the front of our house. While I do this, Jennifer and Hannah decorate the Christmas tree, then place the stockings on the fireplace mantle and add seasonal cheer in the form of various ornaments and charms throughout the house. By the time the day turned dark, our house slowly began to glow with Christmas lights inside and out.

We did vary one Christmas decorating tradition this year. Instead of placing the Christmas tree in our living room, we placed it in the dining room. It made sense. We have a bit more room there. We would not have to rearrange various pieces of furniture in the living room as we do every year.

Looking back I realize I have spent more time in our house this year day-to-day than any other year that we have lived here. Because of this, I now understand how I sometimes fail to see the obvious. For instance, recently we came home from a short adventure. It was raining this day. My first instinct was to walk into the dining room to see if the roof had a new leak. About a step into the room, I realized since the renovation I no longer need to be concerned with that.

More importantly, though, I thought about the changes in the past year late one night. Jennifer and Hannah had both gone to bed. I went through the house making sure doors were locked and lights were turned off. I stepped into the kitchen then looked ahead into the dining room. There, in a silhouette against our new windows between the dining room table and our new green couch, stood our illuminated Christmas tree.

It is the same tree we have had for years. Most of the decorations are ones we have accumulated over the years. The location of the tree was different. The room where it stood had changed from our other years here.

I stopped though for a moment. In the darkness, the tree looked remarkable. The new surroundings gave the tree a fresh backdrop in which to shine. For a moment, I thought about all the changes not just in this room but in life over the past year. I realized how blessed I am in ways I sometimes overlook.

‘Tis the season for sure, a season to reflect on the past but also a time to trust better days are ahead. I hope each of us can find and appreciate the good stuff in life.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Finding Thanks

It is getting so late in the year we can almost stretch out our arms and pull the next year up to us close and tight. What a year this one has been, huh? After all, I never thought I would ever walk into a bank with a mask on but I did several times this year. It’s been one for the books, and one, many of us would just as soon forget. Still, it’s Thanksgiving, and the year ain’t over yet.

It seems as if the year could be encapsulated in a scene from an old Thanksgiving episode of WKRP in Cincinnati. You probably have seen it but I will cut to the chase, turkeys, when tossed out of a helicopter, cannot fly. Here, see for yourselves.

I don’t know but 2020 seems like we all were employees of WKRP. I suppose that is better than being one of the turkeys.

While we near the end of the year, I hope you take some time to laugh. It is good medicine. If you can, spend some time with family. Bonus points if you can share a meal with them. Put down your phone. Facebook can wait. Twitter is a cesspool. Don’t be distracted by the façade social media projects. Take some time to be quiet and just reflect. Breathe in, exhale.

I hope when you take some time that you find people and things for which you are thankful. They are there if you choose to look. By the way, being thankful is something you determine each day. If you cannot find anything to be grateful for, then do something good for someone else, so they can be grateful for you.

Happy Thanksgiving. God bless us all.

And now we thank you, our God, and praise your glorious name. ~1 Chronicles 29:13

SantaCam

Leave it to the eight-year-old. The wheels inside her head seem to always be turning.

As this posts initially appears, Christmas Eve 2019 is here. The tree is in the corner. The ornaments were placed with care, mostly, and presents slowly filled in the space on the floor. To pull off this holiday successfully requires a lot of thought and effort. I am grateful for Jennifer who manages this with her usual grace and patience. Still, about six weeks ago, Jennifer confided in me how our daughter, Hannah, was busy making plans for Christmas Eve, plans that didn’t necessarily involve more than just leaving cookies for Santa and hanging stockings on the mantle.

This year, Hannah wanted to proceed with our usual Christmas Eve rituals. Hannah and Jennifer mix up reindeer food. Hannah then takes it into our front yard so she can spread it over the walkway and yard. Once that is over, she prepares a plate of cookies and a glass of milk for Santa, leaving it in a strategic place near the fireplace. She though had given thought to something else she wanted to do this year.

For some reason, this year Hannah wanted to take my phone and Jennifer’s phone and use them to capture video of Santa and his reindeer as they visited our home. She had given a good amount of thought into how all this could be arranged. Jennifer’s phone could be taped to the wall beside our stairs in the living room. This apparently provides a clear shot of the fireplace and Christmas tree. Outside, she pointed out to me the exact spot on the door, above the doorbell, where my phone could be taped. It would record the front steps and yard while the reindeer ate the food she left for them.

Being a parent is challenging because sometimes providing the right thing to say at the right moment isn’t always crystal clear. Jennifer and I both tried reasoning with her through a series of questions. Why do we need to record Santa? What if Santa is like a vampire or a ghost and can’t be photographed? What if Santa sees the phones recording him and decides to get back on his sleigh without leaving the gifts he has brought? What if the tape we use to secure the phones to the wall doesn't hold as long as we need? And, closer to truth, what if the phone batteries die before he gets to our house? None of our questions seemed to rattle the curious girl leaving us with our own questions about how to get through this without messing up the magic the season brings to children with pure hearts.

This post will publish on Christmas Eve, hours before the traditions in our house appear once more. So, there is no answer for me to give to you on how we will work through Hannah’s request to videotape the jolly guy in red and his tireless work crew. We will somehow figure out something. The important takeaway for me is the bigger-than-the-world heart of a little girl who embraces this time of year for the good things it represents.

I hope each of us can and will, even in some small way, do the same this year. Now, excuse me, my phone needs charged.

30513 Memories: Home For The Holidays

Ready or not the holidays are here. As this post appears, we are wedged in between Thanksgiving and Christmas. At my age, I find myself trying to find ways to make a seven-year-old enjoy these holidays in unique and memorable ways. It often makes me revisit my own memories of this time of year when I was nearer the age she is now. Doing that takes me back to that time and that zip code, 30513.

I recall looking through the Sears catalog in the time before Christmas. While I have often written things down I am not too sure I ever transcribed a list of Christmas gifts I wanted. Still, there were trips to the Western Auto and the dime store where I eyed many things I desired. I also remember visits to see Santa Claus so I could tell him what I wanted. I also recall the tortuous feeling inside when he would ask me if I had been good the whole year realizing there were times when I struggled and failed.

I remember Dad getting out his aluminum extension ladder to hang the Christmas lights on the house. These lights were an older set of varied colors with huge bulbs. Mom usually put up the Christmas tree, off in the corner of the living room, although it also set at times in front of the picture window. My memory also stretches back to a time when we had a silver Christmas tree with a color wheel. I was fascinated by the color wheel more than the odd color of the tree. I wonder if Mom and Dad still have that tree somewhere.

Honestly, I don’t always recall the gifts. I mean I know there was an electronic football game, a Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em boxing game and Hot Wheels. I was also just geeky enough to recall a book about our country’s presidents and a collection of fifty pennies, each one made in a different state. Then there were the clothes: sweaters and pants and shirts. I was less than thrilled with these gifts as this meant I would have to set aside time to try each item on only to face a close examination from Mom on whether or not the item needed to be a different size or altered before wearing. I guess I was short on patience since I had a book to read and had just gotten to the section on Chester A. Arthur.

Spoiled? Yes. Mom and Dad would mention from time to time how their holidays were when they were young. They might get a pencil or an orange. They didn’t drum these facts into my head to make me feel bad but I heard it enough to come to appreciate now how fortunate I had it when I came along. I also know it wasn’t just luck that enabled my parents to provide what they did to us. They both worked hard at jobs and at home to provide and save and spend wisely the money they earned. Such things were not then and are not now pure happenstance.

Looking back, what I remember most from the holidays when I was young were the meals. Insert your own fat, middle-aged guy joke here. It’s the truth though. Yes, there was sweet potato casserole, masked potatoes and gravy, cranberries, green beans, creamed corn, cornbread, slaw, turkey and dressing, glazed ham and pumpkin pie, lime salad, strawberry delight, peanut butter cake and black walnut cake with sugary coconut icing. Those things were there but so was family and sometimes friends. When we gathered together to pray then to eat, that’s really what made the holidays mean something.

Even with a pretty big table and space at a nearby bar just inside the dining room, there was not enough space for everyone in one room. This meant that being one of the younger members of the family, I could eat in the living room. Mom and Dad’s four grandchildren at that time would all get their plates and we would all pile on to the couch or lounge chair or floor and eat away. A football game emanating from the television set would provide the entertainment. Later, gifts would be opened but the real gift had already been opened. We were all together.

I have lived away from there well over half my life now. Even though I can’t really recall the gifts I received from specific holidays, it is those memories from those holidays that form how I expect the holidays to be in some way even to this day. There have been times when I had to work on those holidays and couldn’t be there making me miss what was happening more than I really knew at the time. There were times when I had to make a trip to get there knowing it would be worth the effort. During some of these trips I often wondered about some of my friends from my early years. By then I knew how some of us scattered away from this place and others remained there. I wondered if they were returning to their old home places as well and if they were did they have similar memories hanging around.

For now, Hannah will have her long list of things she will want Santa to bring. She’ll have to sit in Santa’s lap and answer that question he has asked so many kids before about their behavior over the past twelve months. At some point, we will make that drive to where I grew up. We will gather as family as we have for as long as my memory can recall. There will be new toys. There will be food. There may be tears. There will be laughter. There will be love. There will be family. Of all the things I will soak up and drink in at that time it will be the feeling I get knowing this group of people gathered together belongs together. I can only hope that will be a gift Jennifer and I can provide to Hannah to remember when one day she looks back at the holidays she knew as a child.

May God keep you and your loved ones safe and happy through this holiday season.

Bonus holiday playlist:
Bob Dylan "Must Be Santa" 
Kenny Loggins "Celebrate Me Home" 
Patty Loveless "Santa Train" 
The Eagles "Please Come Home For Christmas"
Roger Miller "Old Toy Trains" 
Bill Monroe "Christmas Time's A-Comin'" 
The Band "Christmas Must Be Tonight"
The Soul Saints Orchestra "Santa's Got A Bag of Soul" 
Robert Earl Keen "Merry Christmas From The Family" 
Dan Fogelberg "Same Auld Lang Syne" 

I'm Just Going To Leave This Right Here: The Getting-Through-The-Holidays Edition

I understand the holidays can be hard in a number of different ways. Some miss those who have passed away. Some associate the holidays with sadness or loneliness. Some look at their financial situation knowing a time of belt-tightening is near in order to make it through. Sometimes, a time of togetherness and love often turns sad and dark.

Even in the most enjoyable of holiday situations things can sometimes be fragile. Family members may secretly bicker about what food is being served at the big traditional family holiday celebration. That one lone wolf friend may suddenly obsess over slights from decades earlier. Some may be disappointed in gifts received or the lack of thankfulness offered or not offered in return when they give a gift. It is a thin line separating sanity from insanity when it comes to holiday get-togethers with family and friends.

Still, deep inside, I am an optimist. I believe at least some of the holidays should be filled with some happiness if possible and even if it’s is a fleeting thing. True, it may be hard to find a silver lining in some situations. And truer still, some people just love to bathe and wallow in misery. Still, I like to think if folks try, really try, then something can be found to make getting through the holidays a bit more enjoyable than not trying at all.

Maybe you are one of those struggling with making it through. Maybe the weight of finding the ‘just-right’ gift is weighing you down. Maybe the thought of having to eat more green bean casserole turns your stomach. Maybe the idea of just making it through to January has you down. If this is you let me try to help.

One of my favorite holiday things happened on an episode of a television show which aired October 30, 1978. Maybe because I spent time in both radio and television endears this specific episode to me. Having worked in that world sure makes it easier to understand how something like this can be dreamed up for a promotional event. So, if you are having a time getting into a good mood about the holiday season, just click the link below and receive your free turkey courtesy of our friends at "WKRP in Cincinnati". I’m just going to leave this right here in case you need it. And, be of good cheer, in the words of WKRP’s Jennifer Marlowe, “…a lot of turkeys don’t make it through Thanksgiving.”

Turkeys Away on YouTube