Missing Them

I packed my deodorant and a lot of other things. I fumbled through the dark of the house and out the door early on a recent Sunday morning but not before whispering goodbye to a half-awake Jennifer and then standing at the edge of Hannah’s bed to watch her sleep.

Soon I was on my way to that vast field of concrete and steel known terrifyingly in some circles as the Atlanta airport. Next I was at the ticket counter then through security and waiting for the call to board.

The call to board my flight though was still some time away.

There I sat waiting, checking my email every few minutes but mostly watching people and how they act and interact with others. Soon, I was joined a few seats away by a couple who were probably in their thirties with a young girl, who was probably six or seven years old.

Having just left my wife and daughter a few hours earlier for this trip I must admit I found my emotions a bit raw. I could relate to so many of the things going on with these three. The little girl had a small suitcase she planned to carry onto the airplane. It was decorated with Disney princesses, the same Disney princesses Hannah talks about often. The husband and wife tried carrying on conversations about the business of their life together but their daughter would often interrupt those discussions just like Hannah does when Jennifer and I have to talk sometimes. I watched the mom try to get her daughter to eat just like I know Jennifer would be trying to do if in the same situation. I watched the daughter beg her dad to let her play games on his phone and then watched her work to get his Sprite away from him even when the mom showed a disapproving glance in their direction. I knew each motion and emotion, each action and reaction.

This couple and their daughter sat directly behind me on the first leg of my journey. I didn’t get to observe them but from time to time I could hear them talking and laughing with one another. I found some comfort in hearing their interactions and it made me miss what I have with my wife and daughter, even if I had only left them a few hours earlier.

The next day my business took me to a panel discussion involving five students. The students ranged from high school age to one lady in her forties, who was a grandmother. A couple of students were high school students and the rest were working to expand their education beyond high school. The five, four female and one male, were chosen to appear on the panel because they had reached a certain level of achievement in their education. At one point, each was asked what obstacles they had to overcome to get to the place they were now. Four of the five mentioned some issue with family life. For two of the five, a single parent household meant challenges to overcome, for one the issue was having parents who weren’t very supportive and for the other the issue was being in foster care and having to constantly move and never really having a sense of stability.

Strange, isn’t it, how various things like people randomly crossing your path or even distance away from your loved ones, often provide clarity to the things in life that truly matter? Pairing the couple and their daughter from the day before with the five students and their stories I recognized in a very crystal-clear way how important parents are in a child’s life. Even though my work brought me to this place so far away for a short time I understood my most important work was ongoing as Hannah’s dad and Jennifer’s husband.

The rest of the trip was pretty uneventful, full of business mostly. I did walk on the beach. I went to a farmer’s market one evening and ate some local food. Each night though I retreated to my hotel room, did a little work from there and depending on the time and the time difference either phoned or sent text messages back to home. I looked forward to those few minutes each day. When they were over I relived those moments but somehow they still came up lacking. They always come up lacking because no matter how advanced the technology becomes it can never replace actually being with those you love. As my trip inched closer to it's conclusion, I would tell myself to hold on as that moment when we would all be together would happen again even if I had to walk from California back to Tennessee.